Monday, August 22, 2011

The Friendship Phenomenon

If God had wanted man to have a hyperactive social life, he would have created virtual Social Networking when He created mankind, don't you think?
Yes, I thought so too.

Granted, when He started there might not have been enough people around to create a 'network'. He did spread the seeds of socialising enough to make us "Social Animals", but the Social Beasts and Monsters we turned out to be in a few thousand years of existence must have been a real shocker to Him.

Yeah, I'm talking about you, Facebook. What beasts you are turning us into! What monsters you are pulling out of the deepest and darkest corners of our hearts. What weird beings you are awakening from their safe slumber inside our minds.

We meet a lot of people in life, right from the womb. There are some who accompany us in our journey through life. With some, we're expected to part ways and move on after a while. Now imagine the whole lot of people we've known over the years sitting in our living room, staring at us? Intimidating. And what if they all start chattering?

Some people in life are meant to be kept at a distance. To their credit, many of them know where they should stand. But some don't.

Till a short while ago, I was naïve enough to think that after I find a few close, old friends, there was nothing much to do on Facebook. Maybe we'll just keep each other updated on our progress in life, I thought. I never realised this 'making friends' thing was an outward bound spiral that had no end.

Doubt not, I am an active Facebooker. But there are things that make me squirm in my seat. Like, the people who stare at me from the right frame, whom Facebook claims are people I must know. Common friends: three thousand and twenty five. I am just saying. Yes, I know them. But I tell myself, let them send *me* a Friendship request first, then I will accept. Nothing is going to make me send one to them.

Then there are Walls. What happens on the Walls do not really stay on these walls. Cold wars originate because of these public writings on the Wall.
Because one of them forgot to add an 'LOL' or a smiley to the end of their comment.
Because some thought they were still buddies they were twenty years ago and can still pat the other on the back and say nasty jokes aloud.
Because they thought the owner of the Wall can take a light joke in the right spirit.
Because someone forgot to respond to a comment on their status update.
Because someone posted a picture of you in your high school and tagged you without permission.

I know what makes me uneasy, and why. I also know that it is not going to stop me from visiting Facebook. I also know such a thing either doesn't exist, or don't have much significance in a place like Twitter. And I also know that when such things happen I will close my eyes and pretend it never happened.

After all, if the bus stop is too far and there is no auto available, you gotta walk all the way.


  1. interesting observation....and you are right...wonder if we are going to land up in identity crisis the way u ended it :)

  2. Agree totally Jean.I have recently gone off Fb for similar reasons and the fact that all this chatter undermines your attempt to focus seriously on what you really hold dear.

  3. So very true. Facebook comments and statuses can make you insecure and contribute to losing your focus, especially if you have a goal in mind. The hurt of a nasty comment or wall post seeps into your social life and stays on for very, very long.
    Well written. :)
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  4. Interesting observation indeed... It has become more like an addiction...

  5. The worst thing is when you come up with a profound, humorous or self deprecating status, some people don't understand and takes it to the next level.. Insulting you... If it was some close friends it was fine, but these are guys who are no way close to you. Most of us don't know how to behave in social networks, virtual or actual.

  6. very interesting fact pointed.

  7. First of all, people need to stop giving so much importance to their social networking stuff...Everything is good till you use it moderately